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A brief (but juicy) history of my birthplace (and my birth) -- Partners in immigration crime -- What's the difference between being Persian and being Iranian -- Sporting the Frida Kahlo -- The myth of the Iranian parent -- What do Iranians have against Sally Field? -- Love and other drugs -- My Muslim grandmother and me -- Why do Iranians keep watering cans in their bathrooms? -- I didn't ask to raise this anchor baby -- Rhinoplasty acne-pocalypse -- What is the deal with Iranian weddings? -- Thick as thieves -- Divorce: Illegal immigrant-style -- Why do Iranians always argue over the bill? -- I am a product of incest -- Home, sweet homeless -- Why the hell is it the year 1397 in Iran? -- Sex, prom, and other catastrophes -- Illegal immigrant problems -- I'm undocumented and I'm scared. Any words of advice? -- I am a spork -- An open letter to myself;"Growing up, Sara Saedi was a bright-eyed, straight-A student whose biggest desires were clear skin, acting lessons, and for her crush to realize she was alive. But at thirteen, she uncovered a terrible family secret: she was breaking the law simply by living in the United States. Only two years old when her parents fled Iran, she didn't learn of her undocumented status until her older sister wanted to apply for an after-school job, but couldn't because she didn't have a Social Security number. Fear of deportation kept Sara up at night, but it didn't keep her from being a teenager. Sara pivots gracefully from the terrifying prospect that she might be kicked out of the country at any time to the almost-as-terrifying possibility that she might be the only one of her friends without a date to the prom. This moving, often hilarious story is for anyone who has ever shared either fear."--Back cover.
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