Ebook: The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America

Perfect for the anti-aviary (or bird fanatic with a sense of humor), this snarky illustrated handbook is equal parts profane, funny, and-let's face it-true. Featuring 50 common North American birds, such as the White-Breasted Butt Nugget and the Goddamned Canada Goose (or White-Breasted Nuthatch and Canada Goose for the layperson), Kracht identifies all the idiots in your backyard and details exactly why they suck with humorous, yet angry, ink drawings. Each entry is accompanied by facts about a bird's (annoying) call, its (dumb) migratory pattern, its (downright tacky) markings, and more. With migratory maps and tips for birding, plus musings on the avian population and the ethics of birdwatching, this is the essential guide to all things wings. No need to wonder what all that racket is anymore!;Cover; Title; Copyright; Contents; Introduction; Section 1: How to Use This Book; The Difference Between Birding and Bird Watching; Where to Look for Birds; How to Identify Birds; Bird Size; Bird Shape; Bird Behaviors; Bird Songs and Calls; Ethics; Author's Note; Section 2: The Birds; Typical Birds; American Goldfink; Black-capped Prickadee; Bushtit; Dork-eye Junco; Dumb Western Bluebird; Evening Grossbutt; Golden Crowned Dumb-Shit; Goddamn Song Sparrow; Gray Cat Turd; House Binch; Kentucky Gargler; Lameland Longspur; Palm Burglar; Pine Shitkin; Tufted Titface; Western Meadowjerk